10 things I believe

1.  Love is greater.

It's the name of my blog and my deepest belief.  The longer I live the deeper I believe it.  There is nothing stronger or more powerful than love.  It is the greatest gift we can give others and the greatest gift we can give ourselves.

2.  Don't assume, but if you must, at least assume the best.

God laid this on my heart in a Smith's parking lot a few years back.  I have come a long way from the days of obsessing over everyones intentions and motives towards me but I still have quite a way to go.  I suppose some of that comes with age.  The older I get the less I give a hairy rats ass what other people think of me.  It's just easier to assume the best.  Trust me.

3.  You'll never find your own voice singing someone else's song. 

This is also a thought that God spoke straight to my heart.  The meaning for me is two fold.  On one hand I have always had a passion for singing and song writing but no self confidence to carry out that dream.  I started singing in front of few people in the last year and it feels good.  I think God was trying to tell me that in order to find my own voice musically I need to focus on writing my own music instead of mimicking other artists.  Finding my own style, so to speak.  The second meaning is for life in general.  I will never find out who I am if I'm busy trying to be like everybody else.  I am unique.  Everyone is.  (Which I used to think meant no one is but whatev... we're all unique.)  The more I embrace what makes me me the less shame and guilt I feel for not being someone else.  I am a beautiful mess loved by a perfect God for exactly the quirky, nerdy, disaster that I am.  I think that's finally enough for me.

4.  Drugs are bad mmmmkay... unless they're prescribed by a Doctor.

One word: Zoloft.

5.  If you listen, people will tell you who they are.

I have wasted too many years on friendships with people I don't like thinking that they aren't really the type of person their actions represent.  When people show you their character and who they are as a person: 1. believe them. 2. realize you can't change them. and 3. accept them as is and decide whether they are someone who fits in your life or not. (and be ok with yourself if they aren't)

6.  Cleanliness is nowhere near godliness.

A spotless home and well put together outfits don't make you better than anyone. ever. period. got it?

7.  Perfection has a price.

There is no such thing as perfect.  I didn't know that for a long time.  I tried really hard to be that and believe me it came at a high price.  I was lonely, angry, resentful and unhappy.  My house was clean, my dinner was made from scratch when I invited you to dinner and my kids never talked back but I was ugly inside.  Let perfection go.  You can't ever reach it anyways and trying to steals your joy.  It's not worth it.

8.  Peace is only found in the present.

"If you're depressed, you're living in the past. If you're anxious, you're living in the future. If you're at peace, you're living in the present." -Lao Tzu

9.  Stay in your own lane.

Too often we can spend so much time projecting our issues onto those around us and worrying about what everyone else should and should not be doing.  I have been very guilty of this over the years.  It's much easier to fix someone else, judge someone else and correct someone else than it is to do something about my own issues.  If I would put into action even 10% of the unsolicited advice I give others my life would probably look drastically different.  Let's stay in or own lane shall we and worry about our own issues before we go "saving" other people.

10.  Trust your gut.

If something doesn't feel right it probably isn't.  I have ignored my gut to my own demise many times.  As a victim of childhood sexual abuse I learned to doubt my own feelings and ability to judge good from bad.  My therapist tells me that she notices it's not that I don't have the ability to judge a situation accurately it's that I lack the confidence to trust myself and act on those gut instincts.  I'm working on it.